Malachi - a confession

WARNING: Extremely Introspective Blog Post.

WARNING: Bible Reading Required.

If you haven't done so in a while go read Malachi.  Carve out a solid half hour so you can read it, as it was intended to be read, beginning to end.  (Seriously, please don't read this post until you have read Malachi... Malachi is much better reading anyway.  Also while I have you hear in parenthesis, I will give my standard warning about annoyingly introspective )

If you are like me, and guilty of neglecting Old Testament books that don't start with the letter 'P', you may not notice what an excellent piece of literature this little book is. 

It is the perfect punctuation for the OT. 
It puts our sin right in our face, while giving us hope at the same time. 
It doesn't pull any punches.

This is a book of the Bible written to the religious. Bear that in mind.  The people being warned are do not belong to a wide world of those who do not know God, but to a people comfortable in their theology, content with their level of understanding and convinced of their own righteousness because of how they practiced religion.

I preached out of Malachi once.  It was my last series of messages before leaving the church I grew up in.  I was young(er), (more)arrogant and disillusioned. I used this book like a weapon, as a way of railing against all of the things I thought my church was doing wrong.  This morning I read Malachi, and was very tempted to apply what I read to others rather than to myself.  But as I have been meditating on it throughout the morning, I have been convicted that I need to use the word as a mirror.  Here are some of the verses that convicted me, and my accompanying confessions. 

"I have loved you," says the LORD. But you say, "How have You loved us?"

I am blessed beyond measure, but spend most of my time focused on my "problems".

 ***

"But when you present the blind for sacrifice, is it not evil? And when you present the lame and sick, is it not evil?

Guilty.  How often do I turn in an effort that is "good enough" instead of giving my best to God?

 ***

You have wearied the LORD with your words. Yet you say, "How have we wearied Him?"



So many hours spent talking about things of the Lord, but when it comes time to apply them, I shrink back, or stand silently by while others shrink back, and refuse to properly apply the word.

 ***

"From the days of your fathers you have turned aside from My statutes and have not kept them. Return to Me, and I will return to you," says the LORD of hosts. "But you say, 'How shall we return?

Tradition has been my filter for so long, that I am no longer sure what true worship even looks like.

 ***

"Will a man rob God? Yet you are robbing Me! But you say, 'How have we robbed You?' In tithes and offerings... Bring the whole tithe into the storehouse

I budget: "This time/energy/money is God's, this over here is for family, this is for pleasure, this is for work," etc...  I give what I feel obligated to give, and keep the rest for myself. I convince myself it is more than others give, but if I am honest I now it is less than my Great King is asking of me.  It is all His, but I treat it like it is all mine, and He should be happy with what I give Him.  I rob God.

 ***

Then those who feared the LORD spoke to one another, and the LORD gave attention and heard it, and a book of remembrance was written before Him for those who fear the LORD and who esteem His name... So you will again distinguish between the righteous and the wicked, between one who serves God and one who does not serve Him.

In a sea of those who are religious there is a smaller group made up of people who actually fear the Lord. I must learn to tell the difference.  I must fear the Lord and seek out others who do so.

 ***

"For behold, the day is coming, burning like a furnace; and all the arrogant and every evildoer will be chaff; and the day that is coming will set them ablaze," says the LORD of hosts, "so that it will leave them neither root nor branch. But for you who fear My name, the sun of righteousness will rise with healing in its wings..." 

 

Lord forgive my arrogance, teach me to fear you.







Rethink - Numbers vs. Obedience

As someone involved in ministry I find numbers are far more a part of my life than I'd like them to be. And I find my self in search of a better tool for evaluating success and failure. Within minutes of every conversation about my work as a youth leader, I'll get the question, "How many teens come to your youth group?" People also want to know how many kids come through our children's ministry. How many hours I work, etc. Numbers are the first tool people use to evaluate success or failure.  They are an easy way to put you in a box.

I'll be honest, I chafe under that type of evaluation.  I could have 200 teens coming to my youth group, but I wouldn't know their names or stories, I wouldn't be able to tell you each piece of spiritual fruit that grows, or which branches need to be pruned.  I wish someone would ask me how my teens were growing rather than how many are attending.  Because no matter how much time and energy I pour into youth ministry there will be more teens at the movies on any given Saturday night than at my youth group.  There will be more people at a Waterfront Concert, than in my church on Sunday, and there will be more kids at the Maine Jump than in Sunday School.  If we evaluate by numbers, then the world wins...  every time.

By this point you probably think the point of this blog post is to complain about the way people evaluate by numbers, you may even feel like I am right, but that I'm being a bit of a whiner about it.  Maybe you disagree and think that my desire to be judged on something other than numbers is motivated by an attempt to have people overlook poor performance.  In either case you'd be wrong.  The reason for this blog post is that I still evaluate by numbers.  If you ask me how many teens come to youth group, I'll be quick to brag about the number that have come to know Jesus in the last few months.  If you ask me about the children's ministry, I'll tell you how it has doubled since I took over, and if you ask me how many kids came to VBS last night, I'll be too embarrassed to tell you.  As  much as I don't like be judged by numbers, I still use them to evaluate success and failure.  You know what that makes me... A hypocrite!

Here's one thing I know.  If we evaluate by numbers then we would all have to agree that Peter's ministry was much more effective than Jesus' ministry.  Think about it.  After 3 years Jesus had 120 people convinced that He was the Son of God.  Peter preached his first sermon and 3,000 were added to that number.  We know that Peter couldn't have done what he did without the events of Jesus life, and without the Holy Spirit, but if we were evaluate their ministries like we evaluate the ministries in your church or my church we'd find ourselves more impressed with Peter...

He's another thing I know, most of Jesus miracles were done for individuals.  One life changed at a time, was enough for the Son of God, and should be enough for me.  That VBS I told you about was just what one single mother needed.  Our new approach, of having parents and kids learn together, may have done a number on our numbers, but it was just what one life needed.  Another mom got some great perspective on the changes that have taken  place in the few months since Jesus became part of her family's life, and a lie the devil had been whispering in her ear was refuted.  Another life positively impacted.  And while I would have liked to see more kids, the ones we had were having a great time and learning some great lessons.

Speaking of those lessons, we learned about Peter, called to leave a life of fishing and become a fisher of men.  We learned that even though he had no idea what that meant he left everything and followed Jesus, confident that if he was obedient, Jesus would take care of the rest.  What if we stopped measuring success in terms of numbers and started measuring it in terms of obedience?

Lord, forgive me for being a hypocrite.  Help me to see the world through your eyes, and to measure success and failure in terms of obedience and not in terms of numbers.